Teen Dating Violence

Why are people abusive to their partners?

Posted on 30 November 2010 by admin

This is a really good question. Sometimes people give excuses for their abusive behaviour, but there is never a good reason to use abuse. Ultimately, it boils down to a choice someone makes.  It is true that:

  • Some people grow up experiencing abuse.
  • Some people are insecure so they try to control other people to give themselves a greater sense of power. 
  • Some people don’t value or respect women and choose to abuse them. 
  • Some people don’t know how to deal with their pain so they abuse others.
  • Some people may drink or do drugs and then let out their issues by becoming abusive. 
  • Some people may claim that they have a bad temper or just get so angry that they lose control. 

NONE of these things excuse abuse. Abuse is always wrong.

Abuse is a choice. Someone who has been abusive can change if they work very hard at taking responsibility for their behaviour. They have to admit they are abusive and start to learn how to deal with their emotions differently. Often counselling is needed to make lasting changes, and someone could go to drop-in counselling at 545 Broadway in Winnipeg. Ending the relationship can also help stop the abuse. If you or someone you know is using abuse, try calling the Klinic Crisis Line at 1-888-322-3019.