My story of coming out was a bit more simple than most people. I was really fortunate because my parents actually accepted me for who I was and didn’t really care who I liked. This is how it began.

It all started when I was at school one day, my Math teacher asked the class if anybody was openly Gay and or Lesbian because he was going to a GBLT Conference at the University in my city. Well, that day I wasn’t going to tell him but I did think overnight how much it would feel great, just to get it off my chest. So, the next day I go back to class and I gave him a little note saying “Nobody knows this, but I am Bi-Sexual.” At the time that I told him, the class had already left as the school day was over. So, we signed some paper’s and he ended up taking me to a GBLT Conference on December 14^th/2011.

At the conference, I was a bit nervous as there was about a thousand kids there, if not more. And, I wasn’t used to anything to this extent. You know, being around a room filled with queer people. Yeah, so it was awkward for the first hour, but in the Conference we had to pick three stations to go to. These stations were set up to learn more about your sexuality, and generally just hang out with the thousand of kids that were there. So, I picked Healthy Sexuality for my first, then “What you can do in your community” and lastly, “Genderism and Sexism”. These stations had some really cool queer people who were exactly like myself! For once, I felt comfortable with who I was.

After the conference, I was very confident that I was going to tell my mother that same day that I was Bi. When she got home from work that night, I told her. She wasn’t surprised because apparently I have this super-power that is… well, my voice is girly at times! Woo! Yeah, but she took it really, really well. She said that she would love me for who I am, and nothing would change. However, she said. “Aw, I wanted some grandkids I can actually enjoy!” I was like “Yeah, mom.. I’m bi, not gay! You still might have that chance.” Anyway… after I told her, she told me that she wouldn’t say anything to my dad and would wait for me to talk to him separately.

So, the next two days go by… and, I’m on the computer. Apparently, my dad said something about queer people and my mother responded and kind of blurted out that I was Bi-Sexual by accident. However, I ended up speaking to him alone later on that day. He was like my mother, he took it very well and said that it’s all about love, and that he wouldn’t change anything between us.

I felt like a million dollars, because I didn’t think that I would have told them until I hit College! And, I’m in Eleventh grade right now. So, the jump was wild, and boy did it ever feel good to get that off my chest.

My Brothers, and Sister don’t know anything yet, but I’ll get around to telling them later on. However, until then I’m feeling great because I can finally express who I am, and what I am into. I no longer have to hide from my parents. And, I hope anyone who hasn’t come out. For them to, come out whenever they feel ready. And, people can always surprise you. You’re a special human being. Remember that!

Shawn.

It can be very hard for someone to cope with their experience of any type of discrimination (i.e. homophobia, racism, sexism, etc.). Some people feel like the experience makes them stronger, others feel like it hurts them or breaks them down. For many people it is impossible to erase the hurt that they feel from discrimination.

However, many people can learn to deal with their feelings by seeking support from friends, family, counselors, help lines, and/ or other people who have had similar experiences as them. We can help each other out by trying to put an end to our own discriminatory behaviors, and working to stop discrimination in our schools and communities.

Check out our Appreciating Diversity section for more information on ways you can get involved.

No, scientists are not yet sure exactly what causes someone to be lesbian, gay, bisexual, or straight, but recent research shows that there are biological factors in place before birth that influence people’s sexual orientation.

Sexual orientation is about sexual attraction (who we are attracted to). It may change over the course of a lifetime. It can take years to understand our sexual orientation, and that is normal. Some people who are unsure of their sexual orientation call themselves “questioning.” Also some people consider themselves asexual (not attracted to anyone).

While sexual orientation is not something we can choose, many people do make choices about how to label themselves. They may identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, or straight. Other people prefer not to label themselves at all. All sexual orientations are perfectly normal, whether we choose to label ourselves or not.

Sure!  It’s totally possible for two bisexual girls to be in love, just as it is possible for a straight guy and girl, for two gay guys, for two lesbian girls, or for two bisexual guys to fall in love and basically any two other people!

Of course, keep in mind that being “in love” can be different for everyone.  Some qualities of a healthy, happy, and caring relationship are things like mutual respect, honesty, comfort, fun, and attraction.  These qualities might not equal love, but they are important in any dating relationship!  Sometimes people might feel pressure to label (put a name to) their feelings.  What matters more in a relationship is how you feel, not what you call your feelings.

This question has a complicated answer. The word “faggot” has a long history of violence and sexism, and it is important to realize that history and that pain is still alive in the word as we use it today.

The word “faggot” comes from old French “fagot” which literally meant a bunch of sticks tied together. During the European inquisition in the 1300’s, people accused of heresy or witchcraft would be burned alive using faggots. Also, the people being burned were often forced to carry the “faggots” to the fires being built for them, which made the word take on a meaning of burden and something difficult to bear. This meaning was often applied to women as a sexist slur.

The use of the word “faggot” as a gay slur came from the U.S., though may be linked to British all-male boarding schools in the 19^th and 20^th centuries. During this time younger students took on many tasks for the older students ranging from collecting bundles of sticks for their fireplaces to having sex (often unwanted). To be someone’s “faggot” meant that you were submissive to them. Eventually, the U.S. definition of “faggot” started to be used as a slur against feminine or flamboyant men. Now, it is also used all over North America as an insult to anyone, based on the homophobic belief that being considered gay is the ultimate humiliation to straight men.

As for “gay”, it comes from the French “gai” which meant “happy” “bright and showy” or “carefree”. In the 16^th and 17^th centuries, it began to be used to describe people that “didn’t care” about the moral outcomes of their “indulgence in immoral activities”.  This applied especially to men who had many female sexual partners, but also to homosexual men.

In the 20^th century, people began reclaiming the word “gay” by removing the negative associations from the past and using it as a way to positively tell themselves apart from straight people. “Gay” seemed a more natural fit than the word “homosexual”, which many people felt was too clinical, and “queer” which was still mostly used as a negative term.

As always, before using a term to describe someone, you should ask them if it is ok. While some people have chosen to reclaim certain terms, like gay, queer, or dyke and make them positive, others may not feel comfortable with them based on their negative feelings about the way those words have historically been used to hurt them or others.

Yes, sex re-assignment surgeries (sex change) are available to anyone who needs them. For females who wish to change their body to a male body, the process might include taking male hormones, getting breast reduction/ removal surgery, removal of female reproductive organs (uterus, ovaries & vaginal canal) and/or creating testicles and a penis.

If someone chose to create a penis, this would either be done by enlarging the clitoris or creating a penis from tissues from another part of that person’s body.

For some transgender people, having a sex change is an important part of transitioning (the process of changing your body to match your gender). Others may choose not to have any surgical work done. Also, many of these surgeries are not covered by Manitoba Health, which means a person would have to pay for it themselves.

If you want more information or are thinking about making a transition, you may want to talk to someone at the Rainbow Resource Centre (474-0212) who could refer you to trans friendly doctors, counselors and resources.

Not necessarily, there are many things that determine whether or not a person is gay/lesbian/bi-sexual.  It is not necessary to label ourselves as either gay or straight.  Factors that influence our sexuality are, the feelings we have for people (attraction), the thoughts we have for people (fantasies) or, who we choose to have sex with and/or express other forms of attraction toward (behavior).  You are the only person that can answer this question for yourself. Many youth are going through the same feelings that you are.  If you want to talk to someone about questions you have about being gay or bisexual, contact the Rainbow Resource Centre at 478-1160.  They also have a youth group available that meets weekly.

Sorry but nobody can answer that question but you.  What we can say and make clear is that being gay, lesbian or bisexual is not bad or unhealthy. Sexual attraction is a normal, healthy part of sexuality and who you are as person, no matter what gender you are attracted to!

What is bad is the discrimination towards gay, lesbian, and bisexual people in our society. Discrimination is when someone is treated badly just because they are different. This is what can make high school very tough for all students.

If you would like to talk to someone about your feelings please call the Rainbow Resource Centre at 1-888-399-0005.  The call is private and you don’t have to be gay to call!  Please just remember that the more we learn to accept and love ourselves regardless of our sexual orientation, the happier we will be.

Yes, it is ok and perfectly natural to be gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered.  This is not to say that you won’t meet people and institutions in society that try to convince you that only heterosexuality is “normal” and that people who do not fit into this part of spectrum of human sexuality are misguided or strange.

Each of us deserves the freedom to define who we are for ourselves without others imposing neither their limited views on us nor their expectations of who we should be.

If you would like to talk to someone about sexuality or sexual orientation call the Rainbow Resource Centre at 1-888-399-0005.

Sexual orientation is based on a number of things such as attraction (who you are attracted to), fantasies and dreams (who do you think about being with), preference (who you want to date) and behavior (who you do things with sexually).  All of these things make up your sexual orientation. 

Being gay or lesbian means that you are attracted to people of the same sex, being heterosexual means you are attracted to people of the opposite sex, and bisexual means you are attracted to both sexes.  It is important to understand that it is okay to be gay, lesbian, bisexual or heterosexual.  In addition, sometimes determining your sexual orientation can be difficult and you should never feel you have to label yourself one way or another.

There is not a set age when people “come out” (tell people they are not straight). Some people come out when they are teenagers, others wait until they are out of high school and some people don’t come out until they are much older. In fact some people don’t come out at all. When you choose to come out it usually means you have thought a great deal about your sexuality and feel comfortable telling others.

If you are looking for support or more information please feel call The Rainbow Resource Centre at 1-888-399-0005. You can call this number for free and it won’t show up on your phone bill.